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Thursday, April 30, 2009

Fourteen

My LLB turned 14 today.
She took cupcakes to school so she could celebrate with her friends at lunch. Some things you just never grow out of...
She heard the Happy Birthday Song 5 times during the day.
My LLB is loved.

She is growing into an amazing young lady.
She is smart, funny, and a joy to be around (most days).
She is talented and good at everything she tries - except sports that involve throwing, catching, or hitting a ball. (Genetics were the downfall there.)
She loves chocolate, video games, and hanging out with her best friend, HP.
She is a typical teenager - except she still likes to hang out with her Mom sometimes. And THAT, my friends, is wicked cool.

Happy Birthday, my sweet LLB!

Tuesday, April 28, 2009

Tuesday

Gram and I have dentist appointments today - as in this morning.
Then we are going shopping. Oh, and maybe we'll even go to lunch while we are at it. There's got to be something to look forward to while you are sitting in the chair.

Monday, April 27, 2009

Monday...

Last week at this time I was getting ready to take pictures of the pre-schoolers at our church's pre-school. They are 3 years old and absolutely darling - except to get them to smile I practically had to stand on my head. (I had photographed the 4 year olds the previous Thursday and they were down right easy. They spoiled me!)

What a difference a week makes! This week, I'm frantically searching through my files for a handbell piece - Siyahamba. I have already been through both file drawers, but I just remembered two baskets in my car that have music in 'em. I'll check there next. If the music isn't in those baskets (and I sure hope it is), it's at church and I'll have to run down there before school - which isn't that big of a deal since I'm meeting a friend for lunch and then we are heading off to another friend's P*mpered Ch*f party. Yes, I know I don't cook, but I find nifty kitchen tools for Mr. at those things. Besides, they serve snacks...

My other chores for today include laundry, dishes, vacuuming, dusting, and general de-cluttering. My children generate clutter like nothing I've ever experienced. I had hoped that as they got older, they might generate less clutter (since their toys and games got smaller and smaller), but that is not the case. My family room table is covered with all kinds of shrapnel - video games, controllers, calculators, paper clips, scraps of paper, note cards, a sock, and various other items which I cannot identify. Those items have appeared since Friday evening.

The boys have just left for the bus stop. Mr. has a leaky tire that he's going to have fixed on the way to work. I'm hoping and praying he makes it to the shop. He has a portable tire inflater in his car that he borrowed from Grandpa. (Yes, Grandpa has everything!) He pumped his tire up before he left. Let's hope it's enough... He has the magic AAA card, but it would be nice if he could just get where he needs to go without having to use it.

I guess I've rambled on enough for today... It's just a normal crazy day around here. My day really starts when I go to school. It won't end until I get #1 from rehearsal tonight at 9. The rehearsal is supposed to end at 10:30, but that's just too late for me. I turn into a pumpkin at 10...

Sunday, April 26, 2009

What a week!

I've been out straight the whole week. I thought our schedule would lighten up a bit as we approach May and June, but that doesn't seem to be the case.

#1 is gearing up for the musical - he's in the pit orchestra again this year. I think it will be his last unless they get a new conductor. The kid who is conducting - graduated last year but unfortunately lives locally - is a pain the - ahem - butt! He doesn't send information about rehearsals (like he is supposed to) and then gets mad when #1 can't be there because we've made plans. He doesn't know how to direct - He can't seem to count to 4 - this drives #1 up the proverbial wall. He had the gall to send me a nasty email telling me that my child needs to learn commitment - the silly boy doesn't know with whom he is dealing. (No one is more committed than my #1.) Needless to say, I blasted him back and haven't heard from him since. He's probably hiding in a corner licking his wounds. Emailing him and the director of the entire musical took a big chunk of my time this week. The good thing that came out of all of those emails - I've found out that there is a website with all the rehearsals listed. I found that extremely helpful - as did the Conductor kid. He didn't know that existed either. So... now that I've squared the theater department away, my year is complete.

#1 had his drum major tryouts this week. We've got our fingers and toes crossed. Any good luck you can send our way will be greatly appreciated. #1 has wanted to be the drum major since his very first football game as an 8th grader. I don't think the child has ever wanted something so badly.
They asked him all kinds of questions -
Why should we pick you? Well, I'm tall and everyone can see me. (They nodded.) I'm loud. (They grinned and nodded.) I work hard. (Another nod.)
You say you are responsible. You were late with the paperwork for Solo & Ensemble. What do you say about that? I'm human. (They nodded.)
He had to conduct. He messed it up a little bit, but got right back on. They asked him if he was nervous. He said, "Yes. I am a bit nervous." (He thought, "I'm scared out of my mind up here!")
They asked him a bunch of other questions and then they asked him what would he do differently as drum major. His answer, "Well, I would do something different than the other drum majors. As a drum major you are still part of the band. You are no more special than anyone else. I intend to participate in all the activities they do. When they are running. I'm running. When they are stretching, I'm stretching. When they are jumping off the nearest bridge, I'm jumping off the nearest bridge." He thought they were impressed by that. (That may be the one answer that gets him this position he wants so desperately.)
When we get the results, you'll get the results. The waiting has been excruciating for all the kids and families involved.

LLB did Battle of the Books this year and their final competition was Friday night. We've never done anything like this before. (In a nutshell: you and your teammates read 20 books over the course of the school year. Then you show up to answer questions about those 20 books. There is an individual round where you answer multiple choice questions. Then you do 5 rounds with your team - you need to know the book and the author to get points. Then you do a final round where you have to have 2 answers correct to get points.) LLB and her team didn't win, but they had a great time. LLB scored in the top 5 for the individual and HP got second for the individual. She was blown away! She didn't think she did all that well on the test. (We'd come running in from trumpet lessons at the last minute and she took the test while she swilled down her pizza.) After the competition, we took the kids for ice cream. They do this stuff for the snacks!

In between all of those things, I took my school handbell kids to a school festival out in the Shenandoah Valley for a day. They had a great time and made a bunch of new friends. They can't wait to go back next year.

Yesterday we worked in the yard. What a glorious day! We got the wood all stacked, the lawn mowed, and most of the yard chores done. We took a water break and enjoyed watching the hawk circling and playing on the thermals. This, my friends, is why we live in the country. There was no traffic noise, just the birds chirping... Right now, my back door is open and there is a light breeze blowing across my ankles. The birds are singing, the dog is snoring, and my children are still conked out upstairs. My Mr. is working on his computer out on the deck. Life is good.

If only I could sit and enjoy it... I've got to get my rear to church...

Thursday, April 23, 2009

Sad, but True...

A dog had followed his owner to school. His owner was a fourth grader at a public elementary school. However, when the bell rang, the dog sidled inside the building and made it all the way to the child's classroom before a teacher noticed and shooed him outside, closing the door behind him. The dog sat down, whimpered and stared at the closed doors. Then God appeared beside the dog, patted his head, and said,

'Don't feel bad fella'...they won't let ME in either'.

Monday, April 20, 2009

Ohh... the possibilities!

A woman was sitting at a bar enjoying an after work cocktail with her girlfriends when Steven, a tall, exceptionally handsome, extremely sexy, middle-aged man entered. He was so striking that the woman could not take her eyes off him.

This seasoned yet playful heartthrob noticed her overly attentive stare and walked directly toward her. (As any man would.) Before she could offer her apologies for staring so rudely, he leaned over and whispered to her, "I'll do anything, absolutely anything, that you want me to do, no matter how kinky, for $20.00... on one condition..."

Flabbergasted but intrigued, the woman asked what the condition was The man replied, "You have to tell me what you want me to do in just three words."

The woman considered his proposition for a moment, and then slowly removed a $20 bill from her purse, which she pressed into the man's hand along with her address. She looked deeply and passionately into his eyes, barely concealing her anticipation and excitement, and slowly and meaningfully said....

"Clean my house."

Sunday, April 19, 2009

An Inconvenient Truth


House #1
A 20 room mansion (not including 8 bathrooms) heated by natural gas. Add on a pool (and a pool house) and a separate guest house, all heated by gas. In one month this residence consumes more energy than the average American household does in a year. The average bill for electricity and natural gas runs over $2400 per month. In natural gas alone, this property consumes more than 20 times the national average for an American home. This house is not situated in a Northern or Midwestern 'snow belt' area. It's in the South.



House #2
Designed by an architecture professor at a leading national university. This house incorporates every 'green' feature current home construction can provide. The house is 4,000 square feet (4 bedrooms) and is nestled on a high prairie in the American southwest. A central closet in the house holds geothermal heat-pumps drawing ground water through pipes sunk 300 feet into the ground.

The water (usually 67 degrees F) he ats the house in the winter and cools it in the summer. The system uses no fossil fuels such as oil or natural gas and it consumes one-quarter electricity required for a conventional heating/cooling system. Rainwater from the roof is collected and funneled into a 25,000 gallon underground cistern. Wastewater from showers, sinks and toilets goes into underground purifying tanks and then into the cistern. The collected water then irrigates the land surrounding the house. Surrounding flowers and shrubs native to the area enable the property to blend into the surrounding rural landscape..

~~~~~
HOUSE #1 is outside of Nashville, Tennessee; it is the abode of the 'environmentalist' Al Gore.

HOUSE #2 is on a ranch near Crawford, Texas;
it is the residence of the former President of the United States, George W. Bush.

An 'inconvenient truth.'

Don't believe it? Check it out at Snopes.

All the hype about global warming makes my blood boil. Al Gore is a two faced hypocrite.

Spaghetti Sauce...

We are Italian. We know about basil, oregano, Romano cheese, red wine that comes in a jug, and stuff like that. Now, we make our own spaghetti sauce - AKA: gravy - around here. So, when I was asked to try two new Ragu Sauces, I was skeptical - but, I'll try anything once.

I picked a night when Mr. wasn't going to make it home for dinner. I asked the kids if they wanted spaghetti for dinner, got the requisite "YES!", and proceeded with my devious plan. When I opened the jars I sniffed them. They both smelled pretty good, but I've been fooled before... It's all in how it tastes. I put the two Ragu choices - Sweet Tomato Basil and Margherita - in two different bowls that Mr.'s sauce might have been stored in. I made it look like there wasn't quite enough in one bowl so I had to heat both. (I'm slick like that!)

I put the spaghetti in the kids' bowls and nonchalantly pushed the sauces over. They looked. They knew.
"This isn't Dad's sauce."
"Well, we are doing a taste test tonight for Mom Central. Try them both and let me know if you like them."
"Oh, okay. What do we get?"
"You get to eat dinner."
"That works."
(Yes, my children, it does. Eat it or starve.)

They both reached for a different bowl. They sniffed. They swapped. They sniffed. They swapped back. (It was very interesting to watch. Some psychoanalyst could have a party at my dinner table!) He took the Margherita. She took the Basil. They put their cheese - freshly grated romano - on top, swirled it all around and took a bite. They liked it. They took a taste from their sibling's bowl.

And the results are:
She likes the tomato basil best. He likes the Margherita. He likes the oregano in the sauce - it makes it taste more like a pizza sauce, I think. She likes the basil - it tastes more traditional - like her Dad's sauce. Me - I like them both.

I will tell you that we had the same meal later on in the week. I wanted to see if they would still choose they way they did the first time. And they did... for the most part. LLB put a little of the Margherita in with her big blop of basil - she mixed! And yes, people, THAT was her absolute favorite. Not #1! He is a purist. He likes the Margherita plain. No mixing for him.

So, when Mr. is out for the evening and we are left to our own devices, I can honestly say that we will be using both new flavors of Ragu... Sweet Tomato Basil for her and Margherita for him.

I make homemade pizza. I use the Margherita for that. It is delicious. As a matter of fact, LLB's birthday is coming up and we usually do pizza for her and her friends. They like to make their own individual pizzas. I think 2 jars ought to do it... they like to dip their bread in the sauce while they wait for their pizzas to be done... We've taught them the art of bread dipping and if we try to skip it, they squawk!

Thursday, April 16, 2009

Running with sharp pointy things...

Years ago I gave Mr. a bagel slicer, a circular saw, and a few other tools for Christmas. He decided to try out the bagel slicer and promptly sliced a gash in his finger. (We have also had other mishaps with knives, scissors, lawnmower blades and other sharp pointy things including a wine cork remover. Those are stories for another day, but suffice it so say, sharp pointy things are dangerous - especially in our house. We keep most sharp objects under lock and key.)

I threated to take the tools back and just resort to hiring people to do the home improvements we needed to make. He talked me out of it and proceeded to learn how to use the tools with Grandpa's help and extreme patience. Mr. had 10 thumbs when it came to tools and home improvement projects...


Fast forward almost 20 years...

Mr. is not a home improvement whiz, but he can do almost anything he puts his mind to. He skips most major plumbing and electrical repairs - he knows his limitations and isn't afraid to admit them. As a matter of fact, he's come a long way in 20 years. He can take the tractor apart and put it back together - to running - without any extra pieces left over. He can patch a ceiling - drywall, joint compound, etc. He can paint with the best of them. And - he can demolish anything that needs to be demolished. Now, that's a skill!

This past couple of years he has been begging for a chain saw. We have lots of downed trees that need to be hacked up and burned in our wood stove. He can hear them calling his name every time he goes outside. Last summer, a friend of ours spent a couple of days sawing up some of our logs, but this year... this year is different. The friend has offered to give Mr. chainsaw lessons. In a very weak moment on Sunday, I agreed.

On Tuesday - before I could change my mind - Mr. stopped at our local chainsaw store - yes, we have one - and after much time with the staff, purchased the recommended beautiful orange chainsaw, orange safety chaps, orange and gray leather gloves, and orange helmet. Blaze orange - it's definitely Mr.'s color. It's hot, I tell you...

The lessons start either this weekend or next.

I'm nervous... very nervous.

Wednesday, April 15, 2009

The Jeans...

I chose some clothes to wear yesterday - out of the laundry basket. (They were clean and folded, just not put away yet... they still aren't put away...)

I chose a lovely turtleneck sweater and a pair of black jeans.

As I was mentally considering which necklace to wear with my outfit, I pulled the first leg of the jeans on. It grabbed my thigh and started to squeeze.
Hmm... how long did I leave these in the dryer?
As I pulled the second leg on, the squeezing started at my knee - I was losing circulation in my foot.
How can this be? I only ate one Kit-Kat on Sunday...
Gee... maybe I need to stop eating - like forever! These jeans fit last week...

I pulled them up - with a whole lot of wiggling and struggling. Heck, I broke a sweat!

Then attempted to button them.

I tried to stretch them out a little by bending and squatting. (Like that was going to work!)

Let's just say that there was no way that I could even THINK about buttoning them. The gap between the button and the hole was the size of the Grand Canyon!

Panic set in and I freaked out! OMG! I'm FAT! I'm never eating again!
Wait, what size are these?

I glanced down at the tag to discover - to my great relief - that the jeans did not belong to me - they belong to #1. My tall, skinny, teenaged son. Whew!!

I quickly released myself from the confines of those jeans. My feet returned to their normal pinky color - blue is so unattractive.

I breathed... deeply. Then I went and found some sweats and a fleece...

Monday, April 13, 2009

Going Green

with Electrolux and Mom Central!!


Electrolux and Kelly Ripa have teamed up to introduce an eco-friendly front-load washer and dryer in a truly vibrant shade – “Kelly Green.” The new limited edition shade, an upbeat green, was inspired by the great outdoors and self-proclaimed eco-Mom Kelly Ripa. “I love green … the color green and the act of living green,” said Ripa. “What better place to make a simple, every day difference than in the laundry room? Kelly Green is a gorgeous shade, and just by using the new Electrolux high-efficiency washer and dryer you can save energy and use less water. How green is that?”

Just in time for Earth day, Electrolux is kicking off its virtual flower garden campaign. Starting today, when you go to Electrolux and plant a virtual flower for a friend, Electrolux will donate $1 to Global Green USA. THe best part of this whole thing? Everyone who logs on to the site and plants a virtual flower will be automatically entered for a chance to win a new eco-friendly Kelly Green front-load washer and dryer! And, if your washer and dryer are as old and inefficient as mine, you'll be planting a lot of flowers to try to win these beauties!!

In addition, Mom Central will be giving away one eco-friendly “Kelly Green” washer and dryer set to a lucky MomCentral member! (oooh, pick me!!!) To enter, simply go HERE and (1) tell Mom Central which flower you planted on the Electrolux site and (2) share your own “laundry tips” for saving time and energy. Mom Central will pick one lucky winner in a random drawing from all entries received!

I don't know about you, but I sure do want those beautiful green machines. I could save water, time, and electricity - And, that gorgeous Kelly Green would certainly brighten up my laundry room!

What We Did Over Break...

So last week was the kids' school vacation week.

On Friday afternoon we went to Academy Day to learn about the different service academies - they had representatives from all the schools in one place. It was informative and impressive. Both kids walked away wanting to see the Coast Guard Academy - who knew? I have to say, the guy was terrific and spent more than a few minutes with them.

#1 and I left there and headed off to to Shrine Mont for the Senior High Weekend. He and 3 other kids from our church enjoyed themselves immensely. LLB spent the weekend resting, getting rid of her cold, and controlling the TV.

I had to teach on Monday and Wednesday afternoons. I also had to ring handbells on Monday and Thursday nights. It's a busy week, you know...

We had time to go to the orthodontist for #1. He only has to wear his retainer at night now. He is a very happy boy! While we were out at the orthodontist, I convinced him that we needed to hit Target and World Market. (Hey, a shopping opportunity cannot be passed over.)

Tuesday turned out to be rainy and cold, so our trip to Annapolis was postponed to later in the week. We hunkered down and did some laundry. I'm sure we did something that was sort of fun, but I cannot for the life of me remember what we did.

On Wednesday, after my class, we headed off to the Circus after burgers at our favorite burger joint. #1 squawked that he didn't want to go to the circus, but we paid him no mind. We knew he'd have fun - and he did.

We took the car in for an oil change and hit the movies on Thursday. We saw Knowing. It was a thinker of a movie. We are still talking about it. If you haven't seen it - I think you might like it. After the movies, Mr. picked us up so we could get the car and then we headed out for dinner and more movie discussion.

On Friday we headed out to Annapolis so that Mr. and #1 could see the Naval Academy. We sat through the "why you should come here" lecture - the guy was terrific! We had lunch on campus and then took the tour. Our tour guide was kind of a fart and skipped some stuff, but LLB and I filled the boys in and showed them what they guide had skipped. #1 was impressed, but the amount of math required has him a bit nervous. He wants to keep his options open.

We stopped for dinner after fighting traffic for an hour and a half. We had some excellent college discussion. #1 is going to consider the Navy, but wants to see VMI, the Coast Guard Academy, Grove City College, William and Mary, and a few others. He loves structure and teamwork, so we KNOW he'd really fit in at a military establishment. He is worried about the math requirement, but I'm sure with some help from his teachers or a tutor, he'd be just fine. We told him he could even do summer school at the Academy to get the math done with a smaller class size and nothing else to study. He liked that idea. He is a good math student, he just gets worked up about it.

On Saturday, both children went to take their First Aid/CPR class. It was an 8am - 5pm class at the local hospital. After we dropped them off, Mr. and I headed off to the grocery store for a few things for dinner. We headed home to get some chores done before the kids were ready to come home. They enjoyed the class, but it was a LONG day. They both passed and can now go work at summer camp.

Yesterday was Easter. We spent most of our day in church. My bell choir played for the 8am in town and then I headed up to our church for the 9 and 11. LLB played her trumpet with her mentor and dear family friend (the Trumpeter of Jamestowne) for those two services - they did an amazing job! We ate like kings at coffee hour and then headed home for our own egg hunt and an afternoon of relaxing. LLB and I curled up on the couch under a blanket for some TV time while #1 checked his email and IMed some friends. Mr. did some work and went out for a run... (there is always one over-achiever!)

We had our Easter dinner yesterday evening with the Grandbugs. Our meal started with mimosas, shrimp cocktail, and some other munchies. Then we moved to the dining room. We had boneless pork chops on the grill - wonderful!!! Mr. used his new meat thermometer and the chops were simply amazing - they melted in your mouth. We had asparagus, green beans, cheesy potatoes, and hot croissant rolls. For dessert most of us were stuffed and just looked at the delicious cream puffs, but Grandpa had a couple and said they were pretty good.

Today the kids are sleeping in. It's their last day home. They will be back to the grind tomorrow. But, for today, we're keeping it simple - relax and enjoy.

Saturday, April 11, 2009

X-14

Mom Central asked me to try this new X-14 Mold and Mildew remover.
It says it works without scrubbing and guess what? IT DOES!!!

My bathrooms aren't hideous, but the grout lines weren't pristine, either. I sprayed this stuff on the bathtub walls in the kids' bathroom and my own. I left it to do it's magic while I did a few other things upstairs. -- basically, I followed the directions on the bottle. I also sprayed the kids' shower curtain - it's one of those $1.00 plastic shower curtains that I usually just replace, but I figured I'd give this stuff a real try.

When I returned a few minutes later, the previously yucky grout lines were white. I'll admit that there were a few spots I had to do a second time, but at least I didn't have to scrub, right?! The shower curtain was a whole lot better and after a second shot, it too was presentable.

The smell is strong, but it's not too bad. I would recommend opening a window or putting on your vent fan if your bathroom is small. I rinsed the walls well and the bathrooms smelled clean, not chemical when I left.

This X-14 stuff is like magic. I am definitely going to purchase it when my trial bottle runs out. If you want more information or a rebate coupon, hop on over to the X-14 site. You won't be disappointed!

Thursday, April 09, 2009

The Circus

Last night my family had some "Forced Family Fun"*.

We went to the Ringling Brothers and Barnum and Bailey Circus in Fairfax at the Patriot Center on the campus of George Mason University. The venue is lovely. The parking - free. It's easy to get to and did I mention that the parking is free?

We had free tickets thanks to Mom Central and Feld Entertainment. We arrived at 6:30 and the place was packed because there is a pre-show thingy where you can go down on the floor and see the elephants, dress up in costume, and just be circusy, you know? My children are teenagers. They were not interested. Fortunately for them, that was just finishing up when we arrived or I would have had them down there to take some pictures. (It's all about the scrapbook.)

The Ringmaster is wonderful! He sings - and wow! What a voice! The circus has its own band - we told the kids that if the Navy doesn't work out, there is always the circus! The band played for each and every act and everything in between. They were really good! There is nothing better than LIVE music! Both kids (musicians in their own right) were very impressed with the music, so you know that the band is good.

The acts were great! The clowns were funny - not scary at all. The acrobatics were phenomenal! The miniature horses were so sweet! They had motorcycles in a metal ball thing - the precision! It was awesome! The time flew by! All of a sudden it was intermission.

The second half was as good - if not better than the first half. The tigers were beautiful - they are obviously well fed and well cared for. The meat they ate looked way better than anything we serve here at The Crossing. Yes, we were close enough to see it all! The elephants - my sister's favorite - were just wonderful! (I took about 50 pictures of them hoping I get one good one for her.)

We had a wonderful evening! The kids - of all ages - totally enjoyed themselves. Gram, who doesn't normally like the circus, loved it! I cannot thank Mom Central and Feld enough. It was a wonderful family night. If you are anywhere near Fairfax, get your butt to the Circus! Don't forget to use your MomCentral code to get 4 tickets for $44. That's $11 per ticket and the parking is free. You can't go to the movies for that!




* Forced Family Fun was originally coined by a mom who blogs over at the DC Metro Moms site.

Advice for Women

Two of my dear friends and their families are on a cruise this week. I wish I had given them this advice before they left. Neither of them is particularly shy or introverted, but around new people they tend to get a little quiet. This definitely might have helped them become the life of the party a little sooner... Unless they already new about this and kept the secret to themselves... Hmmm....

Do you have feelings of inadequacy?
Do you suffer from shyness?
Do you sometimes wish you were more assertive?

If you answered yes to any of these questions, ask your doctor or pharmacist about Margaritas.

Margaritas are the safe, natural way to feel better and more confident about yourself and your actions.

Margaritas can help ease you out of your shyness and let you tell the world that you're ready and willing to do just about anything.

You will notice the benefits of Margaritas almost immediately and with a regimen of regular doses you can overcome any obstacles that prevent you from living the life you want to live. Shyness and awkwardness will be a thing of the past and you will discover many talents you never knew you had.

Stop hiding and start living, with Margaritas.

Margaritas may not be right for everyone. Women who are pregnant or nursing should not use Margaritas. However, women who wouldn't mind nursing or becoming pregnant are encouraged to try it.


Side effects may include and are not limited to:

Dizziness, nausea, vomiting, incarceration
Loss of motor control
Loss of clothing
Loss of money
Table dancing
Headache
Dehydration
Dry mouth
And a desire to sing Karaoke

WARNING: The consumption of Margaritas may make you think you are whispering when you are not.

WARNING: The consumption of Margaritas may cause you to tell your friends over and over again that you love them.

WARNING: The consumption of Margaritas may cause you to think you can sing.

WARNING: The consumption of Margaritas may make you think you can logically converse with members of the opposite sex without spitting.

After careful research one has learned that red wine and champagne may be interchangeable with the product - Margarita.

Please pass this on to your wives and girlfriend s. Don ' t let that inner shyness and low self esteem go untreated.

Try Margarita, a little salt and lime

Wednesday, April 08, 2009

Age by Chocolate Test...

Since all those chocolate eggs are in the stores, I thought it would be appropriate to post this...

DON'T CHEAT BY SCROLLING DOWN FIRST!
It takes less than a minute.
Work this out as you read...
Be sure you don't read the bottom until you've worked it out!
This is not one of those waste of time things, it's fun. I promise.


1. First of all, pick the number of times a week that you would like to have chocolate (more than once but less than 10)

2. Multiply this number by 2 (just to be bold)

3. Add 5

4. Multiply it by 50 -- I'll wait while you get the calculator

5. If you have already had your birthday this year add 1759... If you haven't, add 1758.

6. Now subtract the four digit year that you were born.

You should have a three digit number

The first digit of this was your original number (I.e.., how many times you want to have chocolate each week).

The next two numbers are YOUR AGE! (Oh YES, it is!!!)

THIS IS THE ONLY YEAR (2009) IT WILL EVER WORK, SO SPREAD IT AROUND WHILE IT LASTS.

Tuesday, April 07, 2009

Making Life Better

Mom Central asked me to tell you about a new website that Unilever has launched. It's called Making Life Better.

When you get to the web site, it's full of all kinds of nifty information. There are recipes, beauty tips, a free family organizer and more. My favorite part is the coupon section on the right hand side of the screen. There is information about a coupon there that offers you up to $20 back on your ham or turkey purchase by mail when you buy $40 in Unilever products during the month of April. (The coupon was in newspapers this Sunday, April 5th.) Can you even imagine? Your ham or turkey could be virtually free. I like free!

I also liked the Products and Offers link. They had a link from Dove to a page about increasing young girls' self esteem. There are games, free e-cards, a quiz about your body, and more. It's terrific!!!

I enjoyed the recipes page as well... There is a recipe search tool. You choose the type of food you want to cook - dessert, lunch, etc... and how you want to cook it - bake, stove top, etc. and you'll get a list of yummy items you're absolutely going to want to try!

I am really enjoying this website and I think you'll enjoy it, too!

So, click the link and start Making Life Better. Then, while you wait for the page to load, go clip that $20 turkey/ham coupon out of your Sunday paper.

It's all about the A...

The video I had for you was about a guy who was complaining that his kid got a B on his report card.

It reminded us a lot of our house, except that around here it's usually the kids complaining because we make them get an A. It's not that we make them - okay so we do - but they are capable of an A. If they get a B it's only because they slacked off... and they will be the first ones to admit it.

They know what they need to do to get the A and they do it and they do it while they do all the other fun stuff that they do. Does it get overwhelming at times? Sure, but so does life when you are a grown up. Do they know how to deal? Yes. They have learned some valuable skills - study when you have a free moment, do the project early, write the paper now when you have the time instead of watching TV, and the most important one of all - if you need help, ask. We have been known to re-teach math concepts over dinner, quiz Spanish words in the car, toss out story ideas while folding laundry, and go over music late into the night. You do what you gotta do.

So, what about you? Do you insist on good grades? Do you pay for an A? How much do you pay? (We don't pay cash, but they get to eat, their laundry is done, and they don't have to do regular chores.)

Remind you of something??

Mr. sent this video to me. It reminded me a lot of our house.
video

I can't get it to work, so... if you want to see it, let me know and I'll email it to you. It's hysterical!!

Friday, April 03, 2009

The Balloon

Gram sent this to me this morning. I thought it was hysterical... But, I've got an odd sense of humor.

A little boy blows up a balloon and starts flicking it all around the house with his finger. His mother tells him to stop it as he's liable to break something, but the boy continues.

Johnny!" Mom screams. "Knock it off."
You're going to break something. He stops and eventually Mom leaves for a short trip to the shopping center. Johnny starts up with the balloon again after his mom has left for the store... He gives it one last flick and it lands in the toilet where he leaves it..

Mom comes in and while putting away the groceries gets the urge, a diarrhea run. She can hardly make it to the toilet in time and SPLASH, out it comes..

When she's finished, she looks down and can't believe what she's seeing. She's not sure what this big brown thing is in the toilet! She calls her doctor. The doctor is baffled as she describes the situation, but he assures her he'll be over shortly to examine everything.

When he arrives she leads him to the bathroom and he gets down on his knees and takes a long, hard look at the thing.

Finally, he takes out his pen and sort of touches it to see what it might be and POP! The balloon explodes and poop is everywhere. On him, the walls, etc.

"Doctor! Doctor! Are you all right?" she asks.
He says, "I've been in this business for over 30 years, and this is the first time I've ever actually seen a fart!"