Polo Ettiquette

There are 3 sections of seating at polo.  There are the super high priced seats along the rail, the high priced seats where you can pull your car in for tailgating up in back, and the cheap seats on the hill in between the two.
You all know that I'm a cheap seater and proud of it!!!

A friend of ours has a high priced spot up behind where we sit. They pay a LOT of money for their spot.  Last night they weren't there. Some people who paid the cheap seat price put their chairs in my friend's spot. The Polo Police came and shooed them out. We were very glad to see that happen.

Shortly after the Polo Police left, another group of people came and sat on our friend's bench. I was furious! We are very careful not to crowd our friend's spot, sit on her bench, or intrude. To have someone sit on their bench while they are gone just makes me crazy! If you pay for a spot, you get to sit on a bench. If you pay the cheap seat price, you bring your own chair and sit with the rest of us.

LLB was furious as well. She glared at them until they left. Another group of people was on their way to sit on said bench. LLB decided that they were NOT going to take over our friend's spot. She trotted her little self up to their bench and plunked her rear end on it.  One of the people made like they were going to sit with her - we didn't know ANY of these people - and LLB swung her leg up.

She was incensed that someone would think it's okay to take someone else's spot. They could be showing up later. They could be showing up in the next 5 min. Or, they could not be showing up at all. The point is: They paid for their spot. No one should be in their spot unless they've been given permission.  As soon as she was sure that the spot would be vacant for the rest of the evening, LLB came back to her chair in the peanut gallery.... She did, however keep one eye on our friend's spot. 

As she said, "Mom, it's the principle of the thing. They wouldn't mind if we took over their spot, but they know us. They don't know those people and those people don't know them. AND, we would never sit in their spot unless they specifically told us we could."

She's absolutely right!

So - if you go to polo and you pay for the cheap seats - you need to sit in the cheap seats. 

Polo Fodder

I was in the new porta-potty at polo last night. I was there for obvious reasons, but I was really there because the men in my house insisted that these potties were so fantastically wonderful that they required a visit. They were okay. They were portable multi-stall restrooms. But - the stalls - those were itty bitty!!

Anyway, I was finishing up when I heard:
Ring Ring... Ring Ring (the cell phone in the next potty went off)
Sigh...
Umm... hello?
Listen, I'm at polo in an outdoor toilet. Let me step out. (Does she really think the caller needs to know that?)
She exited the stall and stood in front of the sink. (Would the caller really know if she were still in the stall?)
At this point it was too much for me and I started to giggle as I washed my hands.
She went on and on about who was where, who should be where, what she was upset about, and who she was angry at - but when all was said and done, she was still in the potty!


There was a fashion show at polo last night. Some of the fashion was on the models and some was on the polo crowd. Our faves were the lady who showed up in a yellow maxi dress with tiers of very sheer fabric separated by rows of crochet. The best part of the outfit was that she only had on a thong underneath. It was also a halter style so when she bent over, she left nothing to the imagination. Lets just say that my children got an education in "what not to wear". The other favorite of the men in the group was a lady in a white sheer dress with the biggest chest we have ever seen. She was also in desperate need of support. We saw a lot of polo goers with the latest fashion style - winter boots with summer shorts. What's with that? I'm sorry your black leather winter boots with chunky heels do NOT go with your creamy white linen booty shorts and your spaghetti strap top.

R and I were intrigued by the young man who wore knickers, striped socks, a bow tie and a white Ralph Lauren button down shirt with his sleeves rolled up. We decided that he had to be super wealthy because any normal person dressed like that would be considered odd, have no friends, and wouldn't even be given the time of day.

The children got a lesson on the effects of alcohol last night, too. Not something we had intended to teach (and have never had to deal with at polo before), but the opportunity presented itself. The lady who sat in front of our spot was drinking Crown Royal. She drank a LOT of it. At one point she was so toasted that she couldn't even sit up. (It was like watching a car accident - you don't want to watch, but it's just so interesting!) Someone got her a chair, helped her up off the ground, and put her in it. We thought she might fall while they attempted to put her into the chair. It was a good thing she fell back into the chair, because otherwise she would have done a face plant into the grass... I'd bet money that she spent part of the night talking to Ralph on the porcelain phone. Today she is going to be one hurting puppy. We discussed hangovers, poor behavior, and all kinds of stuff with the kids last night. It was good to show them how awful people look when they are totally trashed. Better they see it when they are in high school and be able to discuss it with us than to be that person in college.

Polo is a great time. I love to people watch. And, if I can teach my children life lessons in a safe environment, so much the better.

Next week's theme is College Night. I can't wait to see who and what shows up for that!

Cigar Smell...

Polo always smells like cigars.

We've been going to polo pretty regularly, as you all know.

We are observant people - we saw the blow up doll, we see the outfits, we see pretty much everything.

What we have missed is the cigar girl.

Last night we noticed a young girl walking through the crowd with a cigar tray.

We had a light bulb moment. People don't bring cigars to polo. They BUY cigars at polo.

Things one should not bring to polo...

Polo is a family event.
Family - as in young children, teenagers, elderly, middle aged, etc - you know... family.

We arrived at polo on Saturday and got out table set. We put out our food, made some mimosas, and settled in for an evening of fun.

We were eating our first round of shrimp salad sandwiches when a woman walked across the field in front of us. Gram's sandwich paused half way to her mouth. Her eyes got round and she nodded towards this very attractive woman. I turned - as did half of the crowd. There was a huge intake of air as she walked past different families on her way to her very expensive ring side box seat. I looked closer - Tucked under her arm was a blow up doll. The kind of blow up doll one finds in a porn shop. (Hey I watch CSI, I know where this stuff comes from!) She was nekkid!! Well, she did have one article of clothing - a scarf - covering her neck. Everything else - and I mean everything - was exposed. Oh so attractive... NOT!

The woman strolled down the lawn as if she hadn't a care in the world. As if carrying a nekkid blow up doll was normal for the polo crowd. She found her party. She hugged her friends - with this blow up doll still under her arm. Then she put her doll up on the bench for everyone to see. Oh my the crowd was murmuring... I'm sorry, but I'd much rather look at a stuffed fox than that thing! At least the fox was beautiful. It was totally inappropriate. Who - in their right mind - brings a nekkid blow up doll to a family event? Who brings that type of thing to POLO???

LLB wondered why a grown woman would want to bring a nekkid doll anywhere... She's so over THAT stage in her life! She outgrew that at age 3.

I wondered what kind of person would think it was okay to bring a nekkid blow up doll to polo. (Believe me she was discussed over drinks, over dinner, over lunch, even on our trip back from dropping LLB at camp.) We've come to the conclusion that she's a female chauvinist pig. She is being as raunchy as she can and thinks it is socially acceptable.

Obviously, her momma didn't raise her right.

We decided that she was simply tacky and totally trashy. It doesn't matter how smart you are, how much money you have, or how good a person you are. How you carry yourself, how you dress, what you do, and how you do it makes an impression.
This woman - she did not impress me - Nor did she impress my daughter.

I guess I'm doing something right.

Best Friends

LLB and HP are best friends.
They enjoy each other's company and always have fun when they are together - whether it's an all day thing or a quick 30 seconds in the school hall.
Yesterday was opening night at Polo. We had crazy weather and decided to go at the last minute.
LLB was with us. HP's family was unable to come - they have a very busy day today and were getting things ready for that. While we were at polo, LLB asked to use my phone to call HP.
I handed it over.
The child had nobody to hang with and she was getting a little bored.
She spent an hour on the phone with him - she would have talked longer, but my battery was on its way out.
A little while later - we only had 2 chukkers left - the phone rang. It was HP.
I handed the phone over to LLB since I KNEW he didn't want to chat with me.
The next thing I knew, LLB was telling me HP was on his way. Less than 10 minutes later HP was standing in front of our table.
His father was coming up behind him.
It seems that HP wanted to be at polo with LLB. His dad told him that he would drive, but HP would have to pay the entrance fee out of his mowing money.
Only your very best friend would sacrifice a whole day of mowing to spend 30 minutes with you at polo.
LLB told me that is going to give HP half of the entrance money because it's only fair. Only your very best friend would give you half her birthday money to spend 30 minutes with you at polo.
And really - that's what best friends are all about...

Polo, Potties, and People

We went to polo again last night.
I do love to go to polo on a gorgeous cool night.

The polo matches were very exciting this week. The ponies were fast and there were some really terrific shots (and misses). One poor girl couldn't hit the side of a barn, but ended up getting the last goal of the evening.

LLB told us she wants to try polo. Of course she does.

Anyway... #1 was standing just behind my chair asking me a question during the break between matches. He hadn't said a complete sentence when this white haired gentleman came over and asked if he could sit down. #1 was very respectful, apologized, and knelt down. (Not that there was much to see at that point... The "zamboni" was in the process of cleaning up the arena. Maybe the guy likes to watch the tractor go around...) We thought the man had a chair right behind us. Alas, when we looked, his chair was to the left and a little in front of us... Then we noticed that there were people standing all over the place. He didn't ask them to sit down... #1 isn't that tall... What.ever.

Note to self: Purchase another folding chair so that #1 will have a place to sit when he wants to ask me a question.

The porta potties were wonderful... Just so you know. They usually have the ugly green ones, but this week they had silver ones. They had lights and fans that went on automatically when you stepped inside, real porcelain bowls, TP, sinks - complete with soap, and paper towels. Well... let me rephrase that... The first time I used the potty, it had soap and water but no paper towels. The second time I went, I used a different potty and it had paper towels and soap, but no water. I discovered it had no water AFTER I covered my hands in soap. Yup.. that was pleasant.

Note to self: Put hand gel in pocket - do NOT leave it in the car.


We had excellent snacks, complete with sushi. Yummm!!! The mimosas flowed freely -- almost too freely. At one point, my cup was empty. I asked Mr. who was driving home. He assured me that he was. I then handed him my cup and asked him to fill it. When this Ladybug got home, she did not pass go... she did not collect her $200... she went straight to bed. Thankyouverymuch.

Note to self: It's okay NOT to finish that last mimosa...